IT’S ALL BUT TIME

My heart, rock hard
Yet so fragile
Raw from hurt
But I smile

The pain
It’s well hidden
In a happy face

Constricted in laughter
Is the agony well captured
In the mask of pretence

A facade of confidence
An illusion
That all is well

My heart, so fragile
Yet like a rock, it’s hard
From enduring hurt
Yet I smile

The pain
Is well hidden
In the happy face

In a confined space
Laughter bleeds my heart
Agony crushes my soul

Behind the smile
I am falling apart

Behind the illusion
This heart is torn
In a thousand places

This heart is broken
Shattered
Into a thousand pieces

The soul aches
My spirit is on crutches
Feeble but it lives

‘Tis my spirit
That will heal me

From within
Make me whole

I know ’twill take time
But this heart
Will beat with joy, again

The mask will loosen
And the smile
Will be genuine

And my soul
Will sing for me

Yes, my soul
Will serenade
My confidence

Clear the air
For my mind
To be at peace

Be at peace with me
All of me

And the smile
Will be a sign

A sign of freedom
In the laughter

A freedom
To hurt
To heal

A freedom
To feel
To be real

A freedom
To be human
And be fine

A freedom
That allows me
To be OK when I’m not

A freedom
To be OK with being OK
When I’m not

A freedom
To be at peace
While I wait

Because I know, I know now
That it’s all but time
And the hurt will be gone
And my heart, will be fine

I will be fine
In my fragile rigidity
In my rigid fragility

©️ C Akui 2020/11/9

#Carolsinsights #ThatAfricanGirlPoetry

Image c/- Google for illustration only

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